Fake Nails | Vanity Claire

There are two things in life that I really like: 1) fake nails and 2) being lazy.

While I super respect girls who are amazing at nails and can do all kinds of nail art, I am terrible at it. In fact, I can barely even paint my own nails properly. And even if I do manage to make them look less like I’ve dipped my finger tips into a pot of paint, I am too impatient to wait for them to dry properly and ruin them that way. ZUT ALORS, I am truly an idiot.

So obvi, the only option really is to opt for fake nails. My usual buys are the Boot’s pack of 100 nails which I glue on and paint when I can be arsed. But there are so many beautiful fake nails out there that are definitely worth trying, especially if you’re looking for fake nails that involve zero effort – as well as the opportunity to lie to people who compliment you and pretend you did the nail art yourself.

Here are some of my faves, which I’m sure you will agree are the most beautiful things on the planet ever.

Ted Baker | Faked to Perfection Range

The Ted Baker fake nail range is absolutely beautiful and I have so much love for every single set of fake nails they offer. Each costs £8 to buy, and includes 24 nails and glue. For £8, I really don’t think you can shake your head at that really.

House of Holland | x Elegant Touch Range

If you’ve never come across the House of Holland range of nails, have you been living under a rock with tiny people who know nothing? For anyone looking for amazing nail art that even real life idiots like Josie Cunningham could do, these are an absolute must. The range is quirky and I love it. Some of them come across as a little bit cringe, and I wouldn’t recommend that anyone puts ‘Yolo’ on their hands unless they personally want a punch off me and Claire.

Ali Express | ‘Popular Cute Fake Nails’

Ali Express is an absolutely mad website and shopping on it is pretty bizarre, but it really is a good one to find a bargain on. This couldn’t be more true when it comes to fake nails, because they have a RIDICULOUS amount of nail art on the go for prices that are cheaper than it would cost you for a shot of apple sours. This is a great site if you’re a fan of 3D nails in particular – and I kid you not, prices start from cheaper than £1. Some of them are a bit loud, but worth a look if you’re keen for a bold nail look.

Do you wear fake nails? Which are your faves?

The sun is shining, I’ve just got back from a picnic lunch by the river Avon and life is just genuinely idyllic (apart from the fact I have to continue working this afternoon, snore). While I was walking home from the gym yesterday, I had SO many ideas for blog posts that I walked straight past my house and ended up in the park because I am a lunatic. I’ve been trying to curb my excitement and not pester you all too much BUT I SIMPLY CANNOT CONTAIN IT ANY LONGER. So this is my post on nail ideas and the nails Claire and I have been wearing recently.

A little background information first. Both Claire and I wear false nails. For me, my natural nails are massively thin and no amount of products/nail care has changed this heartbreaking fact. Even when they do grow nicely, they snap off when they reach a certain length, which saddens me every day as you can imagine. I love having long nails and I have been getting acrylic nails done on and off since I was about 16. I also dabbled in doing my own acrylic nails for a while (which worked fairly well but the effort was too much) and now have settled on glue on nails. These are genuinely amazing and I recommend them to any gal who’s looking for length without the price. I’ve taken a little snap of my box at the moment – it’s nearing the end and is looking a bit tired. BUT, when it is shiny and new you can get 200 nails + nail glue for A BARGAIN PRICE OF £8.50. These nails last me about two months, with me applying the nails every week or so.

I’m actually doing my nails at work today (naughty…for important blogging purposes, of course.) because I didn’t get a chance to last night so I thought I’d post a bit of a step-by-step guide to how I do them. It’s not really rocket science – I’m the clumsiest and least coordinated person EVER – so if I can do it, you definitely can too! If you’re keen to buy the Boots nails, you can find them here. Nailene also do a box of 200, but we haven’t seen them in-store for a while.

Excuse the copious amounts of nail caviar at the bottom of the box – this was last week’s nail venture when I used my nail box as a kind of bowl. Another great reason to buy the Boots false nails, the box is multipurpose ;).

The instructions recommend that you file the nail to give the glue a better surface to stick to. I tend to skip this step as I find it doesn’t make a massive difference. There’s no need to damage your nails even more

I then pick out the nail sizes I want – at the moment I’ve run out of my ‘ideal’ sizes so they’re a little big for my nails. I think they still look vaguely ok though!

Then it’s gluey time – no special tips or tricks for this! I just whack them on and hope I don’t glue my hands together…

The exciting bit – painting! Claire and I have both found that nail varnish dries extra quickly on these false nails so that is a definite plus in my book! I usually do two coats of whatever nail varnish I’m using to be sure I get the best coverage. Today I’m going for a bit of pastel action – pink and green! I wanted to do a multi-coloured pastel situation with my Bananan Split Model’s Own colour and a baby blue Barry M nail varnish but I couldn’t for the life of me find them this morning. These two Barry M colours were downstairs, so I grabbed them (clearly thought a lot about my colour choice, eh!) and thought I’d give them a whirl. I went for a pastel green with a pink accent on my fourth fingers (achieved with a spot of sellotape).

And here are a collection of claw pictures that may inspire you if you’re feeling a bit ‘meh’ about nail polish choices at the moment! I’ve tried to remember where all of the nail varnish products are from, but as I’ve robbed these from both me and Claire’s instagrams, I may not have found them all! It’s not groundbreaking nail art…but sometimes you just need reminding why painting your nails is fabulous.

| Elf Desert Haze | Model’s Own Banana Split | Barry M Confetti Bubblegum |

| Barry M Peach Melba | Barry M Foil Effects Gold |Barry M Textured Nails Atlantic Road |

WELL…I didn’t realise Claire and I were such Barry M ambassadors…

The Lazy Girls Manicure: The Fake Nail Edit

Ted Baker | Faked to Perfection Range

House of Holland | x Elegant Touch Range

Ali Express | ‘Popular Cute Fake Nails’

Nailspiration: Nail Ideas for a Sunny Day